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Talk about non-Bongo stuff. BUT KEEP IT CLEAN....there are children watching. Smut, filth, and anything offensive will not be tolerated and removed immediately.

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shuttle
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Valentines Day

Post by shuttle » Sat Feb 11, 2012 11:48 am

Just bought my dear wife's Valentines Day presents.
A new bag and belt.
That will bring the Hoover back up to speed.
Bob
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Re: Valentines Day

Post by Bob » Sat Feb 11, 2012 1:42 pm

Me likey. :lol:
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karena
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Re: Valentines Day

Post by karena » Sat Feb 11, 2012 2:40 pm

me thinky you have very little time to make up for that -or risk the hoover being put where the sun dont shine.
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karena
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Re: The Grim Reaper

Post by karena » Sat Feb 11, 2012 2:41 pm

thats so bad its nearly funny
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karena
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Re: Big Ben Bungee Jump

Post by karena » Sat Feb 11, 2012 2:50 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: now that one i like any volunteers from the "big society" want to go clean up the mess ?
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wormey
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Re: The Grim Reaper

Post by wormey » Sat Feb 11, 2012 3:19 pm

I'm blown away, :lol:
Daz and debs
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g8dhe
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Re: Big Ben Bungee Jump

Post by g8dhe » Sat Feb 11, 2012 3:42 pm

No need to clean up, just let them do it on the River side straight into the water!
Geoff
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shuttle
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Re: Valentines Day

Post by shuttle » Sat Feb 11, 2012 5:31 pm

karena wrote:me thinky you have very little time to make up for that -or risk the hoover being put where the sun dont shine.
I'm not gay so I hope isn't a Henry.
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wormey
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Re: Valentines Day

Post by wormey » Sat Feb 11, 2012 5:51 pm

:lol: :lol:
Daz and debs
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wormey
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Re: Big Ben Bungee Jump

Post by wormey » Sat Feb 11, 2012 5:52 pm

Here here, :shock: :lol:
Daz and debs
shuttle
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One liners !!

Post by shuttle » Sat Feb 11, 2012 6:50 pm

If you get an email saying that you can get swine flu by eating tinned pork,ignore it it's just spam



Just booked the same table for Valentines Day,hopefully she will pot more than two reds this year




Just returned from a meeting at work were the boss asked us to come up with ideas to raise money for charity.
I suggested a sponsored moustache shave,she sacked me on the spot.
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blobber
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Re: The Grim Reaper

Post by blobber » Sun Feb 12, 2012 12:52 am

Got a text off BDC, he was in A&E,.........seems the Dyson Ball Cleaner wasn't what he thought.
Alan & Dot

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I now walk with an angel by my side.
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Re: The Grim Reaper

Post by maxheadroom » Sun Feb 12, 2012 10:14 am

:lol: :lol: nice one
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francophile1947
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Re: Daily Titter - content warning!

Post by francophile1947 » Sun Feb 12, 2012 3:56 pm

Brain Exercise

Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it's important that we keep mentally alert. The saying: "If you don't use it, you will lose it" also applies to the brain.

Below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence. So take the following test presented here and determine if you are losing it or are still a MENSA candidate. OK, relax, clear your
mind and . . . begin.

1. What do you put in a toaster?

The answer is bread. If you said "toast", then give up now and go do something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread", go to question 2.

2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk". What do cows drink?

Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk", please do not attempt the next question. Your brain is obviously overstressed and may even overheat. It may be that you need to content yourself with
reading something more appropriate such as "Children's World". If you said, "water" then proceed to question three.

3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a greenhouse made from?

Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks", what the heck are you still doing here reading these questions? If you said "glass", then go on to
question four.

4. Twenty years ago, a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically
divided into West Germany and East Germany. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he has time and the plane crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East
Germany and West Germany. Where would you bury the survivors - East Germany or West Germany or in "no man's land"?

Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else, you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane crash. Your efforts would not be appreciated. If
you said, "Don't bury the survivors" then proceed to the next question.

5. If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60th of a degree every minute then how many degrees will the hour hand move in one hour?
Answer: One degree. If you said "360 degrees" or anything other than "one degree", you are to be congratulated on getting this far, but you are obviously out of your league. Turn your pencil in and
exit the room. Everyone else proceed to the final question.

6. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading, six people get off the bus and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on. In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on. In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?

Answer: Oh, for goodness sake! It was YOU, Read the first line!!!
John
(Evidence that intelligent life exists in the universe, is that it hasn't tried to contact us)
shuttle
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Dining out

Post by shuttle » Sun Feb 12, 2012 5:28 pm

Had dinner with some cannibals today,they gave me a plate of human digits,I then realised it was a finger buffet .
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